Are you changing your reality? or your idea of happiness?

“It is not until you change your identity to match your life blueprint that you will understand why everything in the past never worked.” 
― Shannon L. Alder

This has been a year of transition and change. It has been. I have been reflecting a lot. How far I've come. How much I've changed. How far I've grown... This is definitely the craziest year I had in my adult life. and I am so grateful that I have experienced everything. Thank you everyone for holding my truth. thank you everyone for reminding me that I am not alone.

The thing I'm really learning a lot right now is this. After listening to Marianne Williamson's lecture, this hit me the hardest.

"THE TIME FOR DATA COLLECTING IS OVER".

I really need to apply all these tools and informations into my life. Self-esteem, believing in myself, connecting with other people, being vulnerable... all these things are the thing I've always wanted. Things that I've craved all these years. And I have read enough books, listened to audios, watched videos, had chat with my friends. NOW it is time to apply all those things into action. Applied knowledges and information are what makes differences. Not on its own. Unless we take that actions, we are not going anywhere.

I was self sabotaging myself big time. I realized that. and see that so much clearer than before. I built the belief that "No matter what I do, I am not good enough". well, ultimately, "I AM NOT ENOUGH". I still wanted to look good, still wanted the validation and praise from others. So I pretended that I WAS taking actions. I told this to some people, but I was so good at leaning at the edge of the cliff, half way there, yet, clinging on to what's left on the edge so tight. Because I was afraid. I was so afraid of failing. I was so afraid of succeeding. From other people's point of view I was always doing something, at least that's what they told me. But for those who see me, ACTUALLY see me, they knew what I was doing. At the end of the day, you cannot lie to yourself. You know what you are doing. You know that you are just saying things. You know that you are just BSing. And yes, I was. I knew that I wasn't doing anything. I was preparing, and storing information. but I wasn't applying anything. Of course, I was terrified of the change! What if people look at me all silly? what if people think I am an idiot? What if they see me and think "WHO DO YOU THINK SHE IS?"? So, I didn't do anything.

I can easily go to beat up mode and say, I should have done this and that and that. There are tons and tons of should have and could have. But why would I want to do that? Why would I want to spend time on the things that I cannot change?

Tony Robbins says,

"people are not happy because they have the ideas of where they should be or how their happiness should look like(blueprint, he calls it). And that's not matching their current reality. There are 2 ways to be happy.

1) you change your blueprint. or
2) you change your current reality"

So, what's it gonna be for you? Are you changing your idea? or are you changing your reality?

Love and light,

"Some people see things that are and ask, Why? 

Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not?

 Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that." 

- George Carlin -

I watched Michael Beckwith's video yesterday and that opened up something new. Really it was an eye opening. And my dear friends Justin Finkelstein and Lindsey Bornstein, and many other. I am so fortunate to be surrounded by these amazing people. 

This year has been a year of transition, the year of shift. I opened up a lot more space for myself both physically and energetically. It is mind-blowing. To see how much has changed. To witness the changes that I've been through from completely different point of view. And because I am on a little bit hyped up state, I could be this positive, and be in the state of empowerment. What if I'm not?! I would rather stay in this bubble, stay this place of love and high and not wanna go back in to the physical realm. Like you just don't want this Christmas Miracles to be over. But the truth is that there will be the point that thing will shift and I will be in the place of doubt and stagnant. What I am doing right now is to work on the muscle to build a habit, so that when that happens, I have a tool to come back. So that I can access the choice with conscious awareness. So that I could say "Yes, I am making this choice.". 

A neighbor and I were just talking and she said something really profound. 

"Where there's an action, there's reaction. No action, No reaction". 

So, let's just take a moment and really reflect on that. Whether you like the reaction or not, the fact that you ARE getting that reaction is a proof that you DID take action. And that's something to be celebrated. Yes, true. Sometimes the actions we take are auto-pilot, or subconscious. Yet the moment you realize that whatever we do, anything for that matters, as long as we are breathing, we ARE taking actions. So we are constantly creating that ripple effect. We are constantly bringing the shift in the collective consciousness and collective energy. That's why people say there's no line between you and I. Because we are connected so closely to each other energetically and we are actually not separated. Separation comes from fear. Separation comes from not knowing. Separation comes from lack of love. Separation is something we created. We are all one. Everything we do pretty much are learned behavior and beliefs. And some of them are ingrained genetically. It's that strong. But, when we take that moment to see things for what is, and see what your physical eyes can see, and connect with that person right in front of you....you will start seeing things differently. 

I realized that I have not been as present as I could have been. As I was watching Michael Beckwith's 90min video, I went on the phone, I opened the different tab on Safari, I went to grab my coffee.... so how present was I? Not to dismiss what I learned from this amazing lecture. What I got from it was HUGE. So think about how much more I could have gotten, if I were 100% present? Imagine. 

We are light. We are love and what we see and what we hear... it all comes back to us. So, why not be more present? Why not share more love? Why not be more present? The question becomes "WHY NOT?" So, ask yourself a question today. WHY NOT BE LOVE? 

Love and light

A New Ground

I wish I could take my own medicine..... That's what I have been thinking for the past few days. lol. Life is funny, isn't it?!

When you start your journey as a seeker and a student of life, you learn a lot. And all these information that we learn, it is no use if we don't apply into our lives. I am a spiritual and self-help book junkie. I love those books, videos, audios.... those are my thing. That makes me feel good. That makes me feel I did something good not only for myself but also for the world. But the thing is that nothing actually happened. I might have put a seed or two in my brain. I might have gained some knowledge. I might have even shared some of these informations and tools with others. But if I don't apply those amazing things into my life, what's that gonna do?

This past few weeks, I have been really struggling emotionally. I have been crying like I have never before. I have been on emotional roller coasters like I have never been before. I have been throwing temper tantalum like I have never before. I have gained so much information and principals that i have not yet to apply into my life. In other people's eyes, I may look like I am doing everything, doing all the "right" thing, "walking" the talk... but who am I kidding? !I know more than anybody that that ain't gonna cut it.

I am finishing this training that I was in for the past 90 days. The people that I met in this group and throughout this period.. they changed my life. Seriously, my life changed. I don't think I am the same person. The people come into my life changed. The way I relate with people changed. The way I connect with myself change. And yesterday, I was freaking out because I thought that the moment this 90 days are over, it's all gonna disappear like the dream. People will disappear. What I have been through was just a dream. And I will be all alone again.... I knew that wasn't true. I knew that this is all real and these people are not going anywhere. And I did have accomplish all these things. The goals that I have and haven't reached are still there. Yet, I was terrified. I knew that I have a choice to shift my thought and be strong. Yet, my emotion were taking over me. I couldn't shake out the feeling. I wasn't making choices. It was easy to stay in that realm.

This experience was all for trying the new ground. And for me, that was allowing myself to feel it. Allowing myself to be vulnerable. Allowing myself to not be alone. Allowing myself to be ok with sharing those. Allowing myself to be really vulnerable and let others support me. And that actually has been a new ground. So, thank you for creating this space. Thank you fro allowing me to be ok with who I am. And thank you for not giving up on me. Thank you for trusting me.

"I AM ME". That's my journey.

Truth... Change is inevitable. I am feeling that more than ever. As a matter of fact, change might be the only thing that is for sure. We constantly change whether we like it or not.

What I am going through is this... The biggest challenge for me is that saying X and doing X. I know that I am good at putting a good face. I know that from the outside, I might look like I am doing 100 million things and being busy and following my dream, quote and quote. And the reality is... different. I am good at preparing for the work. I am good at studying or doing the research, and taking action... that's a whole new story. I realized that I have been "doing it" for the longest time. I have been playing small. I have been playing safe. People have been telling me that I am good at doing this or that. (i.e. taking headshot, or talking to people or doing so many other things). I have come to the point that I made up so much BS that I started believing that. But who am I kidding? I know better than anyone that I am not doing it. I know that I haven't pushing myself to the most. I told some people that I am standing on the ledge. My feet half way out.  I am leaning forward. But I haven't jumped off. I am terrified of jumping off. I haven't trusted the Universe fully. And even that, because I am leaning forward, people think that I am jumping. They haven't seen me jump yet. They think that I am. Have I???

My mentor inspires me so much. She is the reason that I went on this path. At least, she showed me the way. And for that I am forever grateful for that. She lives in that. She lives in the change. She lives in action. She lives in authenticity. She lives in vulnerability. She lives in connection. I have so much respect for her and I am so grateful for her and the path she led me to.


I want to be comfortable being uncomfortable. I get in the little bubble and think that it's all about me. How would people think of me? How would people perceive me? What if people think that I am so conceited? What if people think I am crazy? I didn't want to get hurt. I didn't want to look stupid. I didn't want people to shut me down. I didn't want to hear no. I didn't want to feel rejected or worthless. I know that once I do it, it's not that big of a deal. But until I do it, I make it bigger than it is. We do that a lot, don't we? I believe in what I do. "I AM ME" Project, Essential Oils, Yoga, meditations... all the things that gives me love and purpose and connection... I believe in all that. When I don't trust in the Universe enough I go back into my bubble.

I've always loved singing. Singing was one thing that kept me going. Even though I knew that it is a form of art, I always felt somewhat doing it to make myself feel better. I got the attention. I got compliments. I got what I needed to make me feel better. And the other day, I finally saw that the music is truly a gift. I knew that the message needed to be shared. I knew that what I was singing could inspire people. I knew that I needed to sing that song. I knew that I WANTED to sing that song.

I am on a selfish journey. I wanna soar. I wanna fly. I wanna be me. And I want to get out of my shell. I want to connect. I want to live.

A friend asked me, "Are you trying to prove yourself that you can't do it?"

The self-sabotaging journey that I have been on. I want to stop that now. I want to walk the talk. I want to live what I preach. I want to be more. I want to be me. "I AM ME". So help me walk this journey. Help me live this life. Help me be who I really am.

I love you.

love, hope fatih

What’s going on? 

Everything seems to be falling apart. The election? The Country? The people? and my life? 

People say all kinds of things. "Before all the breakthrough, there’s always a breakdown.” “There’s no mistakes, because whatever the decisions we made, we thought that was the best decision at that exact moment”. Knowing and understanding are different. We see what we see, depending on how we see. No two people see the situation the same. What I see and what you see are different. What I feel based on A is different than what you feel based on A. So, we do what we think is the best at that moment. 

I don’t understand why people voted for Trump. I really don’t. As an immigrant, as a non-us citizen, as a woman of color and a minority, I have nothing to stand for him. What he is this. what he is is the ultimate example of what we could become if we let shadows take us over. He is the representation of 7 deadly sins. Pride, Greed, Lust, Envy, Gluttony, Wrath, and sloth……. God is showing us how we could be if we let ourselves go. God is giving us the greatest opportunity to step into our light. Step into our love. Step in to our greatest potential. That we get to heal. That we get to love. We get to lean in and support each other. We get to love and be loved. We get to shine our light. We are allowed to grieve. It is a part of process. It is necessary to let ourselves actually go through that emotions, rather than pressing it down and hanging on to it. We need to let it go. And after all that, we can finally move on. Move on and step into the light. The light that we were made to be. God wants us to  be the light. God created us as light. We are light. We just forgot that we were. We were so blinded by our earthly possessions like money, or house, or any material objects. But the truth is that we don’t need any of that. We are meant to be prosperous. We are meant to be happy. We are mean to be one. Because there’s actually no separation between you and me. So what I see in you, is exact reflection of myself. I am you, you are me. As a course in miracle says, we are like a drop of ocean or the sun, thinking that we are separate from others. Because we think we are separate, we see things from the place of scarcity. We need to shift. We need ti start seeing things from the place of love, a place of abundance, a place of love and compassion. That’s where we are meant to be. 

Right now, it is ok to mourn. It is ok to be upset. It is ok to be frustrated…. but after all that, we get to let go. We see what’s above all these and will be able to commit to our higher purpose. Our divine creation has been there. 

So, what now? Choose love. Choose compassion. How can we find compassion for those who elected him? How can we find understanding and love while we have completely opposite interest in life? How can we support each other while we stand for something that’s completely contradictory? What can we do? The fact that we are hurting, that means that we care. We care about this country. We care about this family and friends. We care about our future….. That’s why they try to protect. They try to hold on to things that matters to them. They try to hold on to what they have….It’s all the fears. Fears to be separate. Fear to be free. Fear to be loved unconditionally. Fear to be…And that is ok. We get to start from there. We get to move from there. We cannot bring ourselves down to where they are. But we can hold space for them. We can be the light, show them the way and holding the ground for them. We cannot pull them up. They need to do it on their own. So, let’s be the light. Let’s be the love. Let’s thrive. Let’s be one. 

You are divine. Now is a time to unite. Now is time to commit. Now is the time to love and be loved. And there’s no better time than now. Right here, right now. 

It's always the darkest before the dawn

What’s going on? 

Everything seems to be falling apart. The election? The Country? The people? and my life? 

People say all kinds of things. "Before all the breakthrough, there’s always a breakdown.” “There’s no mistakes, because whatever the decisions we made, we thought that was the best decision at that exact moment”. Knowing and understanding are different. We see what we see, depending on how we see. No two people see the situation the same. What I see and what you see are different. What I feel based on A is different than what you feel based on A. So, we do what we think is the best at that moment. 

I don’t understand why people voted for Trump. I really don’t. As an immigrant, as a non-us citizen, as a woman of color and a minority, I have nothing to stand for him. What he is this. what he is is the ultimate example of what we could become if we let shadows take us over. He is the representation of 7 deadly sins. Pride, Greed, Lust, Envy, Gluttony, Wrath, and sloth……. God is showing us how we could be if we let ourselves go. God is giving us the greatest opportunity to step into our light. Step into our love. Step in to our greatest potential. That we get to heal. That we get to love. We get to lean in and support each other. We get to love and be loved. We get to shine our light. We are allowed to grieve. It is a part of process. It is necessary to let ourselves actually go through that emotions, rather than pressing it down and hanging on to it. We need to let it go. And after all that, we can finally move on. Move on and step into the light. The light that we were made to be. God wants us to  be the light. God created us as light. We are light. We just forgot that we were. We were so blinded by our earthly possessions like money, or house, or any material objects. But the truth is that we don’t need any of that. We are meant to be prosperous. We are meant to be happy. We are mean to be one. Because there’s actually no separation between you and me. So what I see in you, is exact reflection of myself. I am you, you are me. As a course in miracle says, we are like a drop of ocean or the sun, thinking that we are separate from others. Because we think we are separate, we see things from the place of scarcity. We need to shift. We need ti start seeing things from the place of love, a place of abundance, a place of love and compassion. That’s where we are meant to be. 

Right now, it is ok to mourn. It is ok to be upset. It is ok to be frustrated…. but after all that, we get to let go. We see what’s above all these and will be able to commit to our higher purpose. Our divine creation has been there. 

So, what now? Choose love. Choose compassion. How can we find compassion for those who elected him? How can we find understanding and love while we have completely opposite interest in life? How can we support each other while we stand for something that’s completely contradictory? What can we do? The fact that we are hurting, that means that we care. We care about this country. We care about this family and friends. We care about our future….. That’s why they try to protect. They try to hold on to things that matters to them. They try to hold on to what they have….It’s all the fears. Fears to be separate. Fear to be free. Fear to be loved unconditionally. Fear to be…And that is ok. We get to start from there. We get to move from there. We cannot bring ourselves down to where they are. But we can hold space for them. We can be the light, show them the way and holding the ground for them. We cannot pull them up. They need to do it on their own. So, let’s be the light. Let’s be the love. Let’s thrive. Let’s be one. 

You are divine. Now is a time to unite. Now is time to commit. Now is the time to love and be loved. And there’s no better time than now. Right here, right now. 

Sometimes, we need to let it kicked.

“Difficulties strengthen the mind, as labor does the body.” 
― Seneca

This is something that I really want to get it through my head lately. "Really listen to what you are saying to other people". Seriously. I preach all these things about positive mindset and how we can shift our life into more empowering way. But the reality is that I get in my head more than I can possibly imagine. If anything, I am in my head probably more than all of you. So, I do admit this. And I admit this publicly and openly. I DON'T LISTEN TO MY OWN WORDS. Meaning, it's time to start listening!!! Well, it's easier said than done, just like everything else. 

A friend of mine, who inspire me so much, told me this yesterday. "Sometimes you just gotta remove yourself from your own head, then put it back". We've heard it before. People say "Be your own best friend". "Don't get in to your head too much". "Focus on right now".... And it's all good and makes so much sense intellectually. But if we can do that just by saying "Ok, that's what I'm going to do now".... how simple would that be? Life would be so much easier, don't you think? Instead, that talk actually makes us go into our head even more, especially those of us who LOVE to analyze things. We want to do it "right". We want to do it "Good". Or if we know that we don't do it "right", we don't wanna do it. So, my friend told me to really take time. Take time to talk to myself just as you're talking to your 5 year old self, or your best friend. We wouldn't talk to your best friend the same way we talk to ourselves. If we do, we might not have any friends at all. lol. It is ok to say, "hey, you did good today". or "you are beautiful." or "Don't be hard on yourself so much". It's ok to say that. We actually should say that. 

For the past few days, I have been frustrated by the way things were going. I was crying more. And all the self development nerd part of me would say "Let's flip the perspective". or "You shouldn't be thinking this way". Or "You should be grateful"... And the other part of me would just say "SHUT UP, I DON'T WANNA DO IT. I CAN'T DO IT. I'M JUST GONNA QUIT". All the ideas and my feelings were contradicting each other. The more I think, the worse things got. My friend also said "It's a minute by minute, second by second choices, you just gotta take one step at a time". I've probably heard something like this so many times. But the way she said it last night made so much sense to me. I've been seen her transform. I've seen her grow. She's much younger than me. And because of that, I had the idea of "Oh, I'm the one who SHOULD be teaching her, or be the example".  But no. It doesn't matter. Her transformation and growth taught me so much. Her experience and her journey. That's what inspire me. It doesn't matter. I was too stubborn to be open. Sure. I might swing back to that place again. And that's ok too. At least I know that I did swing back, and I know how to. It doesn't feel that great to be in the full swing, or what seems to be the full swing. That's part of the journey. When that happen, I have to probably come back to my own blog and read it. ACTUALLY READ IT! We are on this journey, everyday. 

Love, Hope, faith

Growing, one day at a time

I feel like I am riding a roller coaster. The emotional ride that I have been on for the past few weeks, or almost a month, that has been a crazy ride. Why? because I am stretching. Because I am really looking at myself. And that is absolutely scary. Accepting the truth. Accepting my weakness and strength.. all that is a completely new territory. I want to start by this topic. "Receiving support."

Receiving support has not been something that comes to me naturally. I felt weird asking for help. I made me feel weak, incompetent, not enough... It made me feel like I was bothering people. That they have enough thing to deal with.... This is a huge lesson that I am learning. Seriously. It is OK to lean in to people. It is absolutely OK. 

As I stepped more into the life with Yoga and holistic journey, I decided that Acting was no longer my focus. I thought that if I want to come back, I can always go back. Acting is not going anywhere. Entertainment business is not going anywhere. So, I left my acting studio. I updated my website, then I let go of my title as an "Actor". I still love singing, and am still in the chorus. So, my friend and I decided to produce a cabaret show because we wanted to sing together. That on its own was a learning experience. I sang for fun. My intention was to have fun and tell the story. I didn't have to prove anything, like I used to at the audition. The next day, a friend who was in the cabaret show texted me. "Have you looked into the FB post lately? That might make your day". I looked it up, and almost dropped my phone. The Cabaret team was formed by the member of this community called "CREATE", the spiritual community for actors. The owner of the community, saw my performance video then made a post on the FB community. "I didn't know that she sings. And Miss Saigon is my favorite show! I'm gonna talk to the casting". WhAT? And there were hundreds of people commenting on this post. Supporting me, cheering me, liking the post. It was absolutely overwhelming. I was excited, but more overwhelmed, couldn't really process yet. 

Day 2... I saw a FB notification that she tagged me in another post. I wasn't sure if I wanted to look at it or not. "Are you sitting down? I just got off the phone call with the casting. it was about good 10-15 min. they want to "explore" you. "....... Soon after, I received a text from her asking for my headshot and resume. At this point, my legs were shaking. I wasn't breathing right. I was really freaking out. Notifications were going crazier than before. I couldn't look at my phone for good 3, 4 hours. What is going on? What is happening? This is too good to be true. This is not happening... All those thoughts came up. I didn't know what or how to think anything. But I sent her what I had. She texted me back. "Stand by".... 

Day 3... I was still overwhelmed. But now enormous amount of fear and guilt were pouring in. I felt like I was the biggest fraud. I haven't even auditioned for this. I can't do it. I don't deserve this.. what if I don't book? I would disappoint everybody. I didn't want to be there. I didn't want to face it.  And I haven't even gotten an audition. But my head was already going crazy. Around 11 am, I checked email, then there was an email from the casting, titled "Miss Saigon/October 18"..... once again, I almost dropped my phone. I was asked to prepare for the female ensemble, an audition with the producer, music director, choreographer, casting... for my DREAM SHOW. The exact reason that I moved to NYC. That just happened to me. My heart was pounding like crazy. 

Day 4... The material I got was for a female ensemble. I realized that because I wanted to be the lead and only the lead, I don't know anything about the rest of the materials. As I learned the material, I realized the depth of this show. The contrast between the lead and the rest of the character was such a significant part of the show. That's what made everything so interesting. yet, I wasn't able to see that. I was fascinated by the new aspect of this show. The biggest challenge is the voice range. I was not trained as a soprano. And the material required me to sing HIGH C. I knew that I can hit the note. It just sounded like I was making a sound, the squeaky sound. My friend who believes in me and my voice more than anyone, (other than my mom) got me to get coaching session. Then more came in. The FB community reached out to me. A girl, who I've never met, offered to gift me a session with her coach who happened to be the accompanist for the day of the audition. The owner, the one who got me an audition, also gifted me a coaching session with one of the most high demand vocal coach. The funny thing was that I happened to know who he was. Right after I moved to the city, I went to a panel discussion where he was one of the panel. I remember contacting him after that, only to find out I couldn't afford the session with him. And now, that session was gifted to me. I didn't know how to receive all that. Everything was happening, all that I needed was right there. The universe was literally testing me if I can learn how to receive. So, I took them. I took all the help that was offered to me. I did all the coaching lessons. I even asked my friend to support me with dance, just in case I was asked to stay for dance. I put my 100%. Working with Stephanie made me realize that I could sing that hight C. I could sing that high and Im ok. The coaching session with Brad gave me all the information that I didn't even realize before. Drew told me that I can control my voice if I know how to. Deric taught me that I can sing more effortlessly if I learn how to. Karen told me that I am good enough. I AM goOD ENOUGH. Chris taught me how I can have lean into the support. I was being supported like a baby. And that was such an unfamiliar feeling. 

The DAY OF AUDITIOn..... In the morning, I was excited and nervous. But something inside told me to really take a look at all the posts and comments that I have received through FB or text. So, I took time to read them. I felt like I was actually hearing their voices, that I was being supported, that I can lean in and lean back, that I don't have to do this alone. So that's what I did. I allowed myself to be there. Then funny enough, my nerve shifted into a pure excitement. It was grounded and powerful. The feeling that I never did before auditioning. As I got there, I was very calm. I didn't have the competitive "she's perfect for this show" feeling towards other people didn't exist. When I got called into the room, the nerve did kick in. Of course. But I did it. I was able to hit the High C. I was able to "Breathe in roses, and exhale love". Then they asked me to stay for a dance. I am not a trained dancer. But I gave my all. It was different from what we prepared for, but it didn't matter. I gave it all. I was obsessed with the joy and excitement that I felt. It was fun. It was so much fun. I never knew that auditioning can be this fun till right then. All of us were released that day, so who knows? And the best part is that I am happy with either way. 

This whole experience has taught me about receiving, trusting and leaning in. It was such an incredible lesson. I am so grateful for this. I am good enough. I have what it takes. The pendulum will swing back time to time. and that's ok. I am here. And I did hit the damn high C. So, I am happy. I am happy that I allowed myself to be there with others. I allowed myself to take in the support. Life is a strange place. We never know what's gonna happen. That's the beauty of it. I am so grateful for the support from everybody. So grateful for the lesson that I got to learn. I am so grateful that I showed up for myself and got to have fun. I don't have to do it alone. I don't have to be alone. I am enough. 

Thank you for being you. Thank you for leaning on me. thank you for allowing me to lean on you. Thank you for everything. One thing at a time. One lesson at a time. it is ok. Everything is ok. 

Love, hope, and faith..

to infinity and beyond!

“Do one thing every day that scares you.” 
― Eleanor Roosevelt

Right now, I am being challenged like I've never before. I have to completely be honest with myself, face the reality, accept the current truth and step out f that. And it is truly terrifying. As Marianne Williamson says, "doing something new is not difficult, it's just different. Getting over the resistance is difficult." And even as we speak, I am still in resistance. What can I do? The answer is simple. GET OVER MYSELF!!! It is so easy said than done. Absolutely. I am seeing the major commitment right now. I made goals for myself and yet, I am still doing the same thing. Again, the definition of insane is that doing the same thing over and over again and expecting the different result. Of course! It truly is time for a change. I need to change. I want to change! I WANT TO CHANGE.

So, there. I declared it. The very first key to anything is to decide that that's what you want and owing that. A lot of people might think that knowing why or how you're gonna get to XYZ, that's the first step. I think, deciding what you want it the very first step. If you don't know what you want, you can't really do anything. When you go to the restaurant, you can't order anything till you know what you want! Right? First, you have to decide that. Then you order exactly what you want. You don't ask for a pizza when you want a burger. If you want a cheese pizza, you don't just say I want pizza, you're going to say you want a cheese pizza. So be specific about what you want and ask for it. If you know exactly what you want, you just don't say you want food. That's just too vague. Be clear and know what you want. Then, what do you do after you order? Trust. Sure, they might make mistakes in your order, everybody makes mistakes. But at the end of the day, you do get what you order and we know that. You don't pace around and say, maybe they will bring me a chocolate cake instead, which might be amazing. But you know what you ordered and you know that it's coming. So, why don't we apply this to the other area in our lives? Decide what you want in detail. Know that that's what you want. Ask exactly what you want. Trust that it's gonna be there and let it go. The great thing about this in other area is that you might actually get something better than what you ask for. You might not get how you want, when you want. But it will be that or something better. 

"How" will turn out on its own. Trusting and knowing are the hard part. Then taking action. Live through your commitment. That's something that we are not used to. At least I am not in few areas of my life. Even in the area I thought I was good at, I still am not. I want to make things happen more. I want to go farther. I want my life to expand in love, success and abundance. I want everyone's life to be the same. So I am declaring that the I am changing the way of my life now. I am going to commit. I am going to jump into unknown. I am going to trust that what I want or something better will come to me. I am being bold enough and ask what I want loud and clear. So that I can have empowered life.  Jumping into unknown. Let's do this. 

love,

Life as we know it, can change any time.

“Do you wait for things to happen, or do you make them happen yourself? 

I believe in writing your own story.” 
― Charlotte Eriksson

I want to share a lot nowadays. I think it's because of the transition that I have been going through. It was been an incredible journey and I cannot even describe how grateful I am for every single one of the event and people who came into my life.

I didn't want to be the person who'd talk about myself all the time. I thought it was selfish, self observed, and inconsiderate. It took a lot for me to start talking about myself. Yet, what I have been learning lately, has completely messed up what I believed to be true, and what I thought it was the right way to be. Life is crazy, I'm telling you. It's amazing how things can change. It's amazing how things that I couldn't even possibly imagine could be my passion and my dream. I am one of those people who use "divine", "magical", and "miracle" in normal sentences. It's incredible. Now, I am really starting to show my messiness, insecurities, and every part of me. How was I able to do that? or to even get started? Only because I have a group of incredible people in my life. I know that none of these were possible if it weren't for them. They taught me it's ok to be mess. It's ok to share your weakness and emotion, frustrations and all that. It's ok to rely on people and ask for help. It's ok to just be crazy and start singing and dancing. It's ok to be goofy and have fun in yoga class. It's ok to be me and not expect anything. It's ok to ask questions and let them know that I don't know. It's ok to show up with no make up and cry my eyes off. It's ok to be vulnerable. It's ok to own my power. It is ok to be me and do what makes me happy.

I didn't know that I love people so much. I want to connect with people, talk to people and love people for who they are. I want people to know how beautiful they are both inside and out. I want people to know how magical they are, (there, I said it! "magical"). I want people to know that it's OK to own their power and be who they are. I want people to know that it is their birth right to take care of themselves. I want people to know that the fact that they are here proves that they are worthy. I want people to know that they are here for reasons. I want people to know that they are loved. ahhhh. There are so many things that I want to share with people. And I LOVE LOVE, LOVE people so much. It almost feels like a rebound effect, because before, I wasn't like that. I never shared about me. I didn't wanna be vulnerable. I absolutely couldn't look at people in the eyes. I always deflected. I was afraid that people would judge me. I had no confidence in me. I was good at pretending, or presenting to others that I was. But when it comes down to it, I was horrified to be around people. So now that I am learning all these amazing path and tools, the love for the people is flushing in like I just opened the floodgate.

It's so much easier to be in the light, when I am excited and filled with joy and gratitude. It's so difficult when I'm just feeling nothing like that. I get in to my head a lot more than I should. The other day my friend told me not to, and just let go and talk whatever that comes up in my head. I am so grateful to have friends like that. Because of them I get to swing back from that side. I think it is about learning how to swing back every time when I go down the hill. The same way apply when I am super high in love. Sometimes I just can't get myself together because I am so energetic and excited... feels like a kid with sugar rush. And I learn how to get grounded in times like that. It's about balance. It's about inclusive and duality. I don't always have to categorize or know if that 0 or 1. I can tell people "I don't know". and ask questions and not feel stupid or ashamed.

Life as we know, can change any time if we want to. I wanted to change my life. I wanted to be more me. I wanted to be more free. And right now, I have tons of questions, things that I don't know, things that I get upset over... It is ok to be mess and share that with the world. As a matter of fact, we should, so that we can learn from each other. Be you. Be courageous. Be curious. Be love.

I love you.

Love, Hope, Faith...

Born again.

“Those who have failed to work toward the truth have missed the purpose of living.” 
― Gautama Buddha

Last weekend, I had one of the most amazing experience I've  ver had. It taught me so much about me, my belief and my power. It was a breakthrough. It gave me a whole new vision. 

Life is a roller coaster, there's no doubt about that. We have a good day and a bad day. We have an ok day and not so ok day. And yet, it's like the pendulum, it swings back and forth. It comes back to neutral eventually. I love that. And overall, it is in a perfect harmony. The Universe is in a perfect balance as we speak. We just don't see it that way. We hear things and see things that's not present, most of the news that we see on the TV is devastating. People killing each other, destroying this Earth, creating more problems... And those who are aware of these issues, keep fighting for it. People are speaking up, initiating the movement, preaching people to raise up and be a family. Because we are a family. No matter who you are or where you are, we are all family in this Universe. And it is sad that most people don't see it that way. I love how Marianne Williamson explain about us. Each of us are a cell in the body, that's forming the Universe. We are all assigned to different subject. You are assigned for art, maybe you are assigned for politics, maybe you are assigned for animals.... whatever that assignment you got, that is only for you. I cannot fulfill that for you, nor you can do mine. We all have our individual assignment. But we think we know better. We think we can figure out what we are suppose to do. We are all a part of big picture and if we can all fulfill our own assignment, then and ONLY then, the Universe will be a "Perfect" place. Can we make it happen in our life time? Most likely not. Because we are so obsessed by our ego and what we think that's best for us, without realizing what our true purpose is. We already have one. We don't need to go look for it outside. We need to look inside of us. Like the Wizard of Oz, Dorothy had the power to go back to Kansas all along, but she needed to figure it out on her own. She needed to know that she had that power. She needed to know that she was the key to her own destiny. We need to do that for ourselves. We need to know that we are the key to the great future, we are the ingredient for happiness, that we are the magic that we've been looking for. 

I realized that I have been hiding and spending so much time and energy on things that doesn't really matter. I was afraid of what other people think of me. I was afraid of whether if people will like me or not. I was afraid that if I am not doing it wrong... And over the course of weekend, it made me truly realize that it was all transparent. People can see through you. People can see right through you and tell you that you are afraid, that you are worried, that you are hurt. Of course they won't know the details, but people can feel the disconnect, the guard that you put up, the mask you put on. Those are transparent. So why spend so much time on things that's so obvious? Why spend so much time trying to NOT connect with what's important? 

I believe connecting to people in the most authentic way, being truly who I am, being honest to my weakness and vulnerability, paying attention to what's going on inside me, those are so much more important than what I have been doing. 

Another thing that I really loved was this, "being powerful means being able to empower others". This changed my world. Oprah is powerful, Obama is powerful, Gandhi is powerful, MLK is powerful, Maya Angelou is powerful... YOU are powerful. I am powerful. We are all powerful in our own unique way. We are all responsible for our own power. Own that power and be proud of it. It is different from being arrogant or self righteous. It means you are so sure of yourself and your purpose,  what you think of yourself and what others think of yourself don't even matter. Because you are truly in alignment with your purpose, and with serving that purpose for the rest of the world. 

Be you. Be Unapologetically you. You deserve it. Every single ounce of you matter. Your voice matters. You matter. And there's absolutely no mistake you are here for a reason. Right here, right now. 

Love, Hope, Faith

Perfect, NO. Committed? Absolutely. - the lesson I learned from the challenge, ROUND 1 -

“The key to life is accepting challenges. Once someone stops doing this, he's dead.” 
― Bette Davis -

A little while ago, I gave myself a challenge.  A challenge called ABC for "I AM ME". I have been working on this project called "I AM ME" Project. Doing that, made me realize how much I love talking to people, connecting with people, and also don't really know about myself. I've written here so many times that I am good at writing about myself but not talking about myself. Now this comes to the point that I cannot make any excuse for myself. Well, rather, it came to the point that I didn't want to make any excuse for myself. I wasn't sure what I was doing. It's just that I was called to do this project. I was called to reach out to people and go beyond what I was already comfortable. 

So, let's talk about ABC for "I AM ME". It's a very simple challenge. I post up video of me talk about any topic based on a word, or two, starting with that letter. For example, the very first day, the letter was A and I talked about authenticity. It was "LIVE" but not really. I put my FB setting for "ONLY ME" and did few practice rounds. Once I was done, I did post it up. In the beginning, I wanted to do it good. I wanted to make the best video. I was excited. I thought I was gonna talk about all these amazing thing about being me, and all that. I didn't know why I was doing it, or what I was doing it for. But I knew that I was suppose to do it. A lot of actors can agree with me on this, once you have the permission, like given a script, or given a direction, then we can go there. We can do however big or crazy or angry or anything they want us to be. But when there's no script and no direction? We have to give ourselves a permission to do what we want to do. More often than not, we don't. Because we tend to think that who we are, is not good enough. In order for others to tell us it was good, it was necessary for us to stay in the box, meet their expectation, be who THEY want us to be, or who we THINK they want us to be. Or we would be mimicking someone else and we have no idea. Because we are not use to giving ourselves the permission. It is the expectation that WE put on ourselves. It's the FEAR in disguise. I realized that I had expectation for myself, more than I imagined. I wanted those videos to be good, the message to be clear, and the viewers to LIKE them. Ha. Full of expectation. I wanted to make myself look good, obviously. 

And in the middle of that challenge. I decided to actually GO LIVE. I was nervous. Really nervous. Damn notifications that pops up on the bottom screen made me even more self conscious. How many people are watching? How many people are leaving? Is anybody commenting? Then, a friend pointed out. "STOP PAYING ATTENTION TO THE NOTIFICATION". BOOM! I wasn't speaking for myself. I wasn't being clear about my vision or intention or any of that. I was there and I wasn't there at all. So, I stopped looking the notification and decide to stare at myself, which is terrifying by the way. You know what they say when people tell you to do the mirror exercise. "YOU can't lie to yourself, while you are looking at yourself in the mirror." It was almost torture for the first few minutes. Then once I was in the zone, speaking from a deeper place, The nerve started to go away. It wasn't the same nerve any more. It turned into excitement. I turned into something deeper. It went into my WHY. Why I am doing any of this. Why I wanted to start this in the first place. WHY I want to keep talking about my mission and purpose. I couldn't be more grateful for his advice. Thank you. 

Yesterday, it was the letter Z. I actually had to look up what are the words that starts with Z other than zero and zebra. They say it takes 21 days to start forming a new habit. I noticed that I wasn't afraid of talking about myself, at least less than before anyways. I wasn't so stressed about looking at myself any more. I am starting to talk like me, or finding out the way to talk without imitating other people. OMG, I know that without even realizing, I was trying to sound like my teachers, Marie Forleo, Marriane Williamson, Gabby Bernstein... and NOPE! that wasn't happening. I felt like I got the glimpse of talking as who I am and have FUN though. And it was liberating. So, what I took out from this was this. 

1) We have a choice to give ourself a permission to be who we are. 

2) It takes practice to find your way. Experiment. Imitate. Have Fun. Then you find your way. 

3) If I can do it, YOU CAN DO IT. 

4) This is only a beginning. 

5) Be in the moment and truly focus on what's right in front of you. 

I am going to keep doing the challenge, putting myself more on tape. Explore more area of where I am truly not being me yet. I am gonna expand my comfort zone. I am gonna have fun. I am gonna be in the moment.  I am not going to apologize for who I am. And I am gonna commit to it. 

Stay tune for what's more to come. 

"I AM ME" Unapologetically. 

Love, Hope, Faith

No! I know exactly what I want, when I want and how I want!

“You cannot fulfil God's purposes for your life while focusing on your own plans. ” 

― Rick Warren

Let go of the need to control and surrender. That seems to be my theme nowadays. The expectation we put on ourselves can drive us crazy big time. So why do we d that? 

We don't like to think that we are not in control of what's going on around us. When we want something, we know exactly WHAT we want, WHEN we want, and HOW we want. Right? And because we know EXACTLY that, when things go out the way, we get upset. Why isn't it happening? Why isn't it happening the way I want it? Why? Why? WHY?????? The truth is.... we are never in control. What we are in control of is the way we see it, what to see it and how we react to it. We cannot control what/when/how we get anything. It just is not how the Universe works. And we have to accept the fact that whatever it is happening just right now, that's exactly what we need right where you are. NOT what you want, but what you need. We've probably heard that before right? 

So, let me share my story. Up until few days ago, I was really frustrated. My business wasn't going the way I want it to be. I wasn't getting enough result from the clients or the prospect. Especially because of the summer people are out of town, out and about... basically it was really hard to get hold of people. Also, once I get hold of them, the conversation didn't really go the way I wanted them to be. So, I got frustrated. REALLY frustrated. Because I had expectations for myself. I wanted to hit the certain number by this particular day. That didn't happen. I didn't see it happening. Was I doing everything I can? Maybe not, but I thought I was trying hard, at least. But when people weren't responding the way I wanted them to, that was devastating. I wanted to see the result. I wanted to see the numbers. So that I can validate myself that I was doing the right thing. Then my mentor asked me this. "What is it that about yourself that's reflecting your current situation?" Wow. that hit me like a rock. 

1) I was making "TIME and MONEY" as excuses. : When you REALLY want something, you will MAKE time. "The RIGHT time", that doesn't exist. You will figure out the way to come up with the money. So, those aren't actually the issues. It's your commitment to yourself. 

2) I was not committing to myself. : What is my priority? Was my day job priority? Was returning that email my priority? Making a commitment to yourself is THE most difficult thing, in my opinion. It takes persistence, dignity and focus. How many times have you said, "I'm cutting sugar!" or "I'm gonna go to the gym 4 times a week" or "I'm gonna lose 10lbs by this day"? And how did that go? Don't cheat yourself out. Don't rob yourself from owning your own power. You have to really WANT it. And you have to be willing to sacrifice. You have to be willing to say, NO, this TV show can wait. Of course we all have good days and bad days. So, when that bad day happen, you don't have to quit. Acknowledge that you fell off the wagon and get back on it. In order for us to build anything, whether build muscle or habit, we have to get back up when we fall. that's the only way to build. The more you get back up, the stronger foundation you'll make. So don't rob yourself from building that strong foundation. 

3) I was expecting so much from other people. : Again, this life that we live in, we cannot control what's going on in the world. I am my own journey, and you are on YOUR journey. It is not for me to say, "YOU HAVE to do such and such for me so that I can have XYZ." That's not fair to you at all. We don't get to treat people that way. All we can do is be responsible for our own part. Trust that the Universe will take care of you. Not the way you want it to be. But exactly the way you need to move on to that next stage. 

So, what is it about YOUR current reality that you're reflecting on? We can want certain results. We can hope for certain goal. But it's not for us to decide whether we're gonna get it or not. It's so much easier said than done. This could be a life theme for a lot of us. Know that the Universe has your back, not only intellectually, but on the cellular level. Start seeing things from the different perspective? What can I learn from this? What is that I am missing? how can I serve in this situation? How would I see it different if I choose to see the situation from the place of love and compassion? 

You are not alone in this. We can support each other, by sharing what's going on on your mind, your current situation, or the struggle you're going through, or the lessons that you found.... We can all learn something from each other. The exact test you're going through, somebody might be going through as well. So, don't be afraid to reach out to people. Build the muscle to see things differently and trust. And know that the Universe has got your back! 

Love, Hope, Faith

Be Human BEING

“Each person you meet

is an aspect of yourself,

clamoring for love.” 

― Eric Micha'el Leventhal

First and foremost. I love you. Even though I've never met you, even though I will never meet you, I love you. Because you are who you are, wherever you are. I send my love and prayer for Nice, France. Things keep happening. One after the other. We keep hurting each other and blaming on each other. Why? I don't get it. I am glad that I don't get it.

We all want the same thing, we all want love and to be loved. We all want safety for ourselves and for our family. We all want nice food on our tables and educations for the children. We all want to connect with others and feel equal. Then why do we fight? Why do we put labels on things? Why do we compare and compete with each others? Why one side of the street is the richest area on earth and the other side is complete opposite, struggling to feed the children? 

I stopped watching news while ago. I couldn't watch it. All these crazy and devastating news made me sick to my stomach. So I turned away. Still, the news were keep coming in. The social media feed, people talk about it. But I haven't paid attention. I lived in the bubbles. I lived in the lala land where everything was nice and happy. I lived in the place where things were good because I was happy. I am guilty. I am so guilty for all of these. The other day, when I went to see Marianne Williamson speak, it felt like I was slapped in the face. "As a collective being, if one part of the world is suffering and in pain, we cannot be happy as a whole, because we are all one". We are all one. We are all connected. I cannot ignore and pretend that everything is ok, because it's not. We need to be bold enough to speak our mind. So, I am choosing. I choose to be bold and say, I am against this mess. I choose to say LOVE is my religion and I choose to LOVE. I choose LOVE for myself and for others. I choose LOVE. And I am proud of that. They say if you keep complaining and do nothing to change the situation, you are a part of the problem. The thing is that when the problem is big, we all assume that our small effort is not gonna do anything. We think that we are all so insignificant, what we think or say doesn't matter. But it does. What we say or think does matter indeed. What we put out in the Universe does matter. That's why we need to choose LOVE. That's why I CHOOSE LOVE. As Lin Manuel Miranda said, LOVE IS LOVE IS LOVE IS LOVE.....  Yes, I am very fortunate and blessed. I am in the situation where I could write about this and say that I choose LOVE. I have people I love, the roof over my head and I have food on my table. So, YES, I am blessed. It doesn't mean that I don't care. I DO CARE. I do care so much and believe that what we do collectively will make change. If and when we choose to do it together. 

I LOVE YOU. I LOVE YOU more than you can imagine. And I beg you to join me on this journey. I beg you to choose love. Start choosing love. Be compassionate. Be understanding. Be willing to see  beyond what's on surface. Be brave to speak out. We are all light. We are all human beings. We are all one.  DOn't pretend that everything is ok. Don't be alone. We are all in this together. 

Love, Hope and Faith

My religion is LOVE.

 "Everything in Nature is a wonderful miracle. 

Isn't the little bird flying through the vast sky a miracle?" 

—Amma 

I went to see AMMA yesterday. It was my first time. It shook me to core. Right after she gave me her blessing, I felt like I just got hit by a truck. Her energy was enormous. Overwhelming amount of love flood through my whole entire body. No words can explain what it was like. If you've ever met her, you would know what I am talking about.

It felt like I was going down the rabbit hole. Is that what Alice felt like? It was powerful beyond measure. Before I approached her, they asked me what my mother tongue was. Although I've been working on accepting my Japanese side, I caught myself being hesitant to say "Japanese". I almost said "English". My ego was saying "Can't you hear me talking to you in English? I have almost no accent". After I told them it was Japanese, they told Amma that I am Japanese, that my mother tongue that is. She gave me a big hug and whispered something to my ear repeatedly. I couldn't really make out what she was saying. It didn't matter anyways. It must have been a matter of 10 seconds or so, but it seemed like an eternity. I felt my grandmother's presence who passed away when I was 15 years old. She kept telling me that "It's going to be ok." After I stood up, a tear fell out of my eye, then one, then another... it just kept pouring out from my eyes and I didn't know how to control myself. And somehow I knew that I didn't have to. I felt insignificant, so small, so tiny, compare to her enormous presence, I was nothing. I felt powerless. And yet, I felt unlimited possibility, that what I thought my "grand master plan" is so tiny compare to what I am actually capable of. I felt my ego being shrunk up. Is this what love feels like? I was confused, overwhelmed, shaken up. I still can't explain what it was. But it felt like, I was experiencing the duality of the world, the expansiveness of the world, and possibility and the end of the world. How can a person do this? How can this small woman have such a strong power and love? How is any of this possible? So I kept crying. I didn't care.

We are all mere collection of tiny matter. The difference between me and you is just the combination. We were made out of the same thing. So that's why we are one. Because what makes us who we are is the same energy. What we experience, what we take in, those constantly affects the patterns of the combination. That causes different vibrational frequency and balances. We are all the same. If we can just tune into that oneness and love more, then we get to understand each other more. Because our vibration start match. It's fascinating isn't it? We spend so much time building up walls that's preventing us from becoming who we are, who we truly are. So we cannot have the same frequency as the others. It might not be possible to have the exact same frequency as others. It doesn't matter. The bottom line is that we are all the same. We are all here to be who we are, just the way we are. We have to love ourselves. Please love yourself. You are who you are for a reason. Your gift is your gift so that you can fulfill your part, so that you can raise that vibration with those who need you.You are beautiful inside out. Please do know that.

The brief meeting with Amma made me want to become better. She made me want to expand more, serve more and be me more. Imagine how many lives we can change if we all just realize that all of us can have that much of love at any time. And that's actually how it should be. I cannot wait to see the day that'll come true. To see the day when people share love, respect each other with love, have compassion and empathy, and help each other. Our possibilities are infinite. There are so much more than what we know. Don't limit yourself because of your past. Don't hesitate to get out of your comfort zone. Don't be afraid of your own greatness. Don't be afraid to reach out to others and seek for help. Don't be afraid to be you. Because you are powerful. you are beautiful. You are light. You don't have to ignore the shadow side. Embrace that shadow side so that you can emanate more light. Embrace that "Ugly" part so that you can be more compassionate. Be you. Share love. That's all it is.

I love you all, more than you can imagine.

Love, Hope, Faith

You are not Alone

“Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much” 

― Helen Keller

You don't have to do anything alone. That is something I am learning the great value of lately. Even better, trying to everything is rather selfish, as my mentor say. Can you imagine and understand that concept? I wouldn't even have been able to understand that concept a year ago. Why would doing everything would be selfish? Why would being responsible be selfish? Why would taking care of myself completely would be selfish? I am not bothering anyone, if anything, I AM HELPING OTHER PEOPLE! right? But, the answer is NO. Because you are not giving other people an opportunity to love you. Because you are saying NO to other people's kindness and love. Because you are shutting yourself out from the rest of the world. You are not even acknowledging their existence. And THAT is selfish.

We often think that asking help is a sign of weakness, that we are not capable, that we are incompetent, that we are not good enough. Because of the idea that we have to be perfect or independent. Because we think as an adult, "we should be able to take care of ourselves". And a lot of us tend to be a giver. We give, give, give and not allowing ourself to receive. Giving is great, by serving others, we shift our focus to what's more than our ego. Serving for others gives us the great deal of kindness and gratitude. At the same time, ask yourself. What else are we getting from? Are we making ourselves feel better only by serving others? or by making ourselves believe that because we are a giver, we are better than them? Are we building the false idea that as long as we give, people won't reject us? It's great to feel being needed, being relied on.. because it gives you the sense of purpose, something to live for, right? Brene Brown talks about this in one of her talk. She said, "As long as we can't ask for help without judgement, we are always helping others with judgement". It blew my mind. And that is true, at least to me.

Do you remember the first time when your parents asked you to help them? Taking your dishes to the sink or, helping the bag from the market, or doing anything, because you are big enough to help them. Do you remember how that made you feel? It made you feel like you are being acknowledged, or believing in you, or being encouraged even. And that made us feel good, didn't it? Whether we actually were helping them or not, at least it made us feel like they found value in us. It empowered us. That's still the same. Even though we are grown up, we can still have that same effect on other people. The fact that we don't ask for help, it means we are not acknowledging other people around you and their strength. You could be even robbing the opportunity for them to grow. Imagine, if your parents kept brushing your teeth, you would never learn how to brush your teeth on your own. It's the same thing. People say a good leader knows how to find value in others and delicate the task. It doesn't mean that you can just drop everything on them. That's a different story. The point is, we don't have to do everything all on our own. We can do it together. We can lean in and create something even better. We can feed off of each other and make things more powerful. That's the beauty of co-creation. We are all different, have unique skills and that is exactly why when we work together we can create something more powerful. A piano player can create a beautiful music on her own, yet, when that pianist join force with the whole orchestra, that multiplies the scale, add some choir, then that'll add more power, add the audience.... It doesn't mean what that pianist created isn't good enough. It's beautiful. And there are much more possibilities all around the world.

We all want the same thing.  Not being alone. We want someone to listen to us, someone to hold us and say "Everything is gonna be ok, I got your back." And you are not alone. So, you don't have to do it alone. Ask for help. If you are so uncomfortable ask for help, start from something small, like "can you please pass that salt for me?" It doesn't matter. Start from somewhere. And practice. You are not alone.

Love, Hope, Faith