Be in love with Taking ACTIONS

“It was my letting go that gave me a better hold.” 

― Chris Matakas, #Human: Learning To Live In Modern Times

I just watched the video in which Will Smith talk about importance of failing. We have to fail more often.

This seems to be the theme of the week. The videos I watch, the talks I hear, or the articles I read, they all seem to talk about how we should not be afraid of failing, trying something new and not getting attached to the outcome, or even to look silly. We have to keep trying and not be afraid of what we call "failing". But what defines "failing"?

We were told and taught to set goals, so that we can plan, prepare and act. And I do not disagree with that strategy. However, the problem is, to me, that we are setting wrong goals. No matter how much we want or we try, there are things that we are not in control of. As a matter of fact, with few exceptions, most of the things in our lives are out of control. We are in charge of our actions, the way we react after something happen, the attitude we can have, or how we perceive the world. Basically we are in charge of what's going on inside of ourselves. However we are not in charge of what's going on outside. We don't decide if we get that job or not, if we win the lottery or not, if people act the way you expect them to.... so on and so on. Because we are so attached the outcome which is not in our control, we want things to happen the way we want, how we want, when we want. The sooner you accept that, the better you'll feel. So, why not shift the whole idea of "failing". What does "failing" mean?

The definition of failing, according to Google search is

"a weakness, especially in character; a shortcoming".

No wonder we are afraid of failing. It's engraved in our brain that failing means that we are not good enough, not providing a certain result means that means we are weak, or not good enough. Of course nobody wants to fail. We don't want to admit that we are not good enough. We don't want to be told that we are weak. We don't want to feel that way at all. So, there's absolutely nothing wrong with us to be afraid of failing. So how can we overcome that feeling?

By shifting the goal. What if our goal is to try, or to take action, or to put yourself out there. Not the result. Not if you get into the school, or if you get the job, or to get whatever it is the result you want. What if we just focus on our own action? I'm not saying that having plans or goals, something you want to get is bad. It's important to have that motivation, clear mindset of dreams and goals that you desire to achieve, and to work hard for it. I think that is absolutely necessary. We want that clear vision of what we want, where we are going. But we need to remember that that is not the only thing out there. We want to keep open mind. My teacher use this example of the road trip from Miami to Portland. You start driving from Miami, but in somewhere, you made few wrong turns and you ended up in California. You love it, you had a great time in California. But you actually didn't make it to Portland. Does that mean you've failed? Of course not. If you choose to keep driving to Portland, you can still get there. You had a slight detour and that's it. California isn't your final point, you can still keep going. That's not a problem. Then, if you choose to stay in California, that's your choice. You fell in love with California. You made the choice to stay. Enjoy that stay. You don't need to beat yourself up for not making your goal. You don't have to tell yourself "oh, I'm not good enough because I didn't make it to Portland". You don't have to do that. You took the action, which is to drive. Then you found new paths, which is California. You never know, maybe once you get to Portland, you might change your mind and come back t California. Who KNOWS!? It doesn't make you weak or wrong. You took action. That's all it matters.

Start shifting your goals. Start seeing things from the different perspective. If your goal is to get into that University, instead of getting in, think about studying hard for the entrance exam or an interview. If your goal is to get the promotion, switch it to work as hard as you can. Detach yourself from the outcome. You can always make a new goal. You can always change your goal. Not getting the "result" you want, that doesn't make you any less. Be in alignment with the feeling of getting the goal, the happiness you feel, the accomplishment you'll have, the gratitude you'll have, be in tune with that high vibration. That makes you happy, doesn't it? Imagine you are there already. Take actions and have fun. Give yourself a permission to not get that outcome and still love that. The more you do it, the more you'll love the fact that you took action. Be in love with taking action. Be in love with the highest vibration you are sending out while you are taking that action. And let go of the rest. If your goal is to take actions, you'll never fail. You are good enough. You are more than enough. Don't forget.

Love, Hope, Faith

all feelings exist together.

“In order to eat, you have to be hungry. In order to learn, you have to be ignorant. 

Ignorance is a condition of learning. Pain is a condition of health. 

Passion is a condition of thought. Death is a condition of life.” 

― Robert Anton Wilson, Leviathan

"Good morning, how are you?" When people ask you that first thing in the morning, what is your answer to that question? "I'm good"? "So, so."?  "I'm tired."? "eeehhmmm, whatever"? 

When I was younger, I saw the interview by this actress. "I want to be a person who doesn't say I am tired when actually am". Mind over matter. That's what I thought. And she does portray that type of energy and personality on TV. She is like a good role model, a good mother and a wife. She seemed like one of those "put together" woman. That moment, I promised myself that I would be just like that. I didn't want to seem negative. I didn't want to look tired. I didn't want people to think that all I do was complaining. So, I took that initiative to commit myself to this promise. Whenever people asked me how I was doing, I'd smile and say "I'm great!". For a long time, people perceived me as such. By default, I am a happy person, and I love that about myself. Hugging, smiling, laughing, playing, having fun... all those are the things I love. Sometimes people would come up and say "you seem like you have no worries in the world whatsoever". Just as my dad said, I took that as a huge compliment. I mean, isn't it?! I thought it was. I am doing great! I am not complaining or energy sucking Vampire. I am being positive and happy. From outside, I was definitely "put together" kinda person. 

But why does it have to be that way? The answer is NO, it doesn't have to. It doesn't also mean, you can just complain and nag all the time. It just means that we are all allow to feel whatever we are feeling. It's there already anyways, why deny them? The fact is that the more we deny, suppress, or ignore those feelings, the more of those you would end up feeling. Have you been in the situation where you realize that you are upset and try to calm yourself down? How did that work for you? It doesn't really work for me. when I do try to calm myself down, whether I am upset or nervous, I end up getting that feeling more. The society has given us the ideas that certain emotions are wrong, negative, or not proper. Getting angry, crying, too excited, or not to excited, anything too extreme is not appropriate. "Girls shouldn't get upset like that". "Men shouldn't cry in front of people". "We should think about being proper". So we learned to not to feel without even realizing it. The bad part is that that's the only way that we know how to raise kids, because your parents were probably raised the same way you did, and the list goes on and on. We only know what we know. It's a whole global brainwashing system. Right? But, we all feel what we feel. If we weren't suppose to feel all those things, why do we feel them? Or rather, if we have those feelings regardless, what's wrong with allowing ourselves to feel them? 

It doesn't mean that you can act out and punch people in the face, or scream at people, or start going crazy. If you are upset, you are upset. If you are sad, you are sad. There's nothing wrong with you. We don't have to suppress your feelings. Allow yourself to feel it. Acknowledge that it's there. "Yes, I am feeling upset" "Yes, I am very sad". Sit still and give yourself a permission to experience that feeling. The problem is that we live in such a high pace life, that we don't really have time to sit and experience that feelings. Most of us have build the defense mechanism that's auto pilot. We've learned to deflect our feelings and emotions. The moment we feel that so-called "negative feelings" we wear masks. When I was working at the restaurant, whenever I got upset, my immediate response was to smile. I just smiled. I wasn't suppose to show my feelings. I was suppose to smile and just nod. I wasn't suppose to get upset. The longer, I worked, the easier it got. The more I ignored my feelings, the more numb I became. Then when something huge happened, I almost snapped. I didn't know how to react. I wasn't treated in a way I should have. I wanted to scream at them right there. But I wasn't ALLOW to. I didn't know how to process that feeling, but I cried. Even that, I had to cut it short because I needed to get back on the floor. I put myself together, put on a smile that I was already attached to me, then I stepped out on that floor. Now that I have been out from that job for over a month I realized that how much stress I have been putting on myself. Yes, you can't just leave your job. You have bills to pay and mouth to feed. But it doesn't mean that you have to ignore what you are feeling. You can and you are suppose to feel those things. Those are there to tell you that you need to take care of yourself. Yes, mind over matter. Some people are very strong, strong enough to overcome those "negative" feelings right away and put on the lovely smile. I was one of them. But, you are not being truly authentic to yourself. Again, you don't need to act upon it. If your boss or coworker, friends or family member upset you, go to a bathroom and give yourself few minutes to just feel it. You don't have to shut down that feeling. and for the love of God, please don't. 

We are more than enough. Whatever we are born with, we are suppose to have it. It doesn't mean that we have to keep all of it. But it's there for reasons. Maybe it's there for you to overcome. Maybe it's there for you to teach YOU something, or teach Others something. It's there for you to learn to forgive yourself. It's there for reasons. Without sadness and pain, you won't learn to be compassionate or to be happy. Without darkness, you won't see the light. Start to allow yourself to be in that duality or the polarity. It is OK. You don't have to be all "put together". You don't have to portray the happy person. You are you, include all that. There's nothing wrong with you. You are just learning to balance. And you are not alone. 

Love, Hope, Faith

When is your time?

“I am no longer hesitant.

I am ready.

I am fearless.” 

― Jessica Brody, Unchanged

I think we are lazy and scared, by default. Nobody is courageous and fearless all the time or even by default. The difference is that some people made the choice to work hard and to take risks. It's a choice. People say this "If you wait for the right moment or the perfect moment when all is safe and assured, it may never come". And that's the truth. How do you know when is the right timing? How do you know that this is the right person or not? How do you know that this is actually your dream job? How do you know any of that if you've never try. Having XYZ amount of money in your bank account won't guarantee that you won't worry about money any more. Achieving that XYZ states will not promise you that people would respect you or love you. Having a degree in XYZ does't promise you a good future. So why do we wait for the right moment? What is the right moment? 

Whether you show up or not determines the result, no matter what. If you show up for whatever that is, even if you fail, you don't ever have to be tormented by the feeling of "but, what if I did show up?" or "what if I did do it? You make that decision. You've heard that right before people die, what they regret is not what they did, but what they didn't do. And that's not exactly a right moment to notice that because you are about to die for God's sake. You make the decision that this is the right moment even if that scares you. You make that decision to say that I am not going to be lazy any more, even if that takes you out of comfort zone. Things changes. What's going on outside of us changes constantly, even as we speak. People change all the time. We change all the time. So, whatever the elements that we think that'll make "the right moment" doesn't exist. All it takes is for you to say that "This is the right moment because I said so". 

Why do we wait for the "right" moment? Because we don't wanna fail, we don't want to look bad, we don't want want other people to think we are stupid, we want something to fall back on... the list goes on and on. The reality is that we are only creating excuses for ourselves. We are just so focused on what we shouldn't do this, rather than why we should do this, or what our heart is telling us to do. Make a choice today to be bold. Make a commitment to yourself that you will show up for yourself. Make a peace with yourself that you are more than enough. More than enough it doesn't mean you don't have to work hard. If anything you have to work even harder. Accepting that you are more than enough means that you are taking a responsibility for your own life. It means that you are surrendering yourself to your full potential. Be bold as you're created to be. Be courageous as you've created to be. Be divine as you've created to be. 

Love+Life+Faith

Happy International Women's Day

“I am no bird; and no net ensnares me: I am a free human being with an independent will.” 
― Charlotte Brontë, Jane Eyre

Happy International Women's Day for all you beautiful ladies out there. I believe in the power of Women. Whether you are old or young, we all have tremendous power within us. Our voice matters. Our vision matters. We matter. So, don't fall into the pitfall of how women "should" or "shouldn't" act. Those are the things that created by humans. Not what the Universe wants us to be. The Universe doesn't put limitation on us. We do. Sometimes other people do it for us. Sometimes we do it to ourselves. Why? We are afraid that whether if we are doing it right or not. We are afraid that what other people might think of us. And most of all, we are afraid that maybe we are not good enough.... And this isn't only for women, but for everyone. We are afraid that we are not good enough.


I watched this TED Talk by Reshma Saujani a day before IWD. It gave me chills. It did. Our behaviors and belief, our lack of confidence and bravery are not only affecting ourself but our future generations. Children mirror adults. They learn from us. And it creates bad cycles. If we are not brave enough to make mistakes and or to take risks, we will not develop our confidence or build self-esteem. But without confidence or self-esteem, we will not try to take that risk. Again, we fall back into that pitfall. We will always be afraid of what other people would think of us, whether we are doing it right or not, or maybe we are not good enough... I don't want us to be that way any more, or the next generation to grow up with that bad cycle. Take risks. Jump into unknown. Try something new. Be willing to look silly. Be willing to be wrong. And don't be afraid of what others might think of you. The truth is that people will think of whatever they want to think of you. And most of the time, they are worried so much about themselves and they are not even worried about you. You are worrying about yourself, she's worrying about herself, he is worrying about himself. So, why do you spend your time worrying about what others would think of you? Everything in our life is it's easier said than done. It takes courage to get over that fear, if we ever could get over it. We don't need to look perfect for others. We don't need to do right thing all the time. We learn from making mistakes. We learn to stand from falling down. We are here to grow. If we don't try, how can we ever learn anything? We don't have to be perfect. As a matter of fact, we will never be perfect. Even the most confidence person in the world, would have his or her bad day. I assure you. We are not a finish product. And that's exciting because we have more room to grow.

Know that you are good enough. Know that you are beautiful. Know that you are talented. And we cannot do this on our own. I cannot do it by myself. You cannot do it yourself. We need to do it together. You and I. Men and Women. Boys and Girls. Old and Young. Every colors and every ethnicities. We all need to do it together. We need to realize that we are all in this together. We are HUMAN. Whatever you do, you are not doing it for yourself, but you are doing it for everyone else as well. What you've been holding back to say, might be something others might needed to here. The idea you have might help solve the problem. The fact that you step up could inspire so many people. Be responsible for your life. You being responsible for your life will ultimately result in the greater good of the Universe. You are here for reasons. Don't be afraid. And when you are, go back to the place of love. Always, from the place of love.

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Love, Hope, Faith

You are so divine.

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. 

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure"

-Marianne Williamson-

Why do we not trust in our own value? More often than not, we doubt ourselves. We believe that we are not worthy.  We have nothing to offer. That leads into fear. Because you are comfortable being there. You got so comfortable sitting in the chair that made you feel home. And stepping out from that means to be uncomfortable, to take responsibilities, and to risk everything basically. So we rather keep brainwashing ourself that we are not good enough. right? It's easier that way. It's easy to stay in the comfort zone and complain that how things are not working for you, or how people are not treating you the way you should be, or how you are not getting what you want. Guess what? If you are the one holding you back from reaching your full potential, how would everyone else treat you better than how you treat yourself? 

To trust in your own value, that takes courage. It takes enormous amount of courage. You might have some people telling you "know your place" or "who do you think you are" while you are growing up. Or you might have been in a circumstance where people constantly brought you down and you started to believe that's your truth. Or you might have listen to someone talk so low of themselves so often and you started to believe that's the way you were suppose to think. But it is not. Your truth is more than you can possibly imagine. You are beautiful, talented, capable, smart and you have so much to offer. That is your truth. Don't let the fear take you over. Fear will always talk to you in the most effective way, because it knows your weak point. Fear and ego conspire together and try to tear you apart. You don't have to be the victim of it. You are worthy. You are the divine creation of this Universe. 

The Workshop I am currently in has a tremendous impact on me. A) to help me realize the great importance of the community that I could rely on. B) to have people who tell me who I really am. If you've read the Untethered Soul by Micheal A Singer, you know how he talk about the voice within you. He explains it as your roommate. The voice will always be there, but it's not you. So the voice inside of us would tell us all the mean things. Imagine you telling that to your own friend? You wouldn't do that, would you? No! Not in a million year. Then, why do we do that to ourselves?  To have people who constantly reminding me who I am, that has been a major change for me. In the beginning, or even still now, I have times that I am not in alignment with that. People tell me things and I cannot accept. People tell me I am beautiful and talented, and I automatically say NO. People tell me how great I am and right away in my head I respond "No, I'm not." Like, we all knew this. we all know somewhere deep down that we are meant for something great. We are meant for something big. And that gut feeling is actually right. We are here for reasons. Our own unique reasons. And no one can take that away from you. The only person who would be in your way is YOU. Don't rob yourself from that great opportunity to become who you truly are. What's wrong with saying, maybe I am good at this, or I look beautiful in this red lipstick, or I am amazing at this job. Why can't we give ourself that credit? Why can't we believe in our true potential? Why can't we be who we truly are? The answer is YES. It has always been yes. Yes, you can give yourself the credit. Yes, You can believe in your true potential. and YES you can be who you truly are. Yes, yes, and YES!!! All those little voices are there just to keep you safe. They just wanna protect you. they just wanna be recognized and heard. Just acknowledge them that they are heard. Their voice doest have to be your truth. You are better than that. You are worth so much more. You are divine. You are truly divine. And I want you to be you, unapologetically you. Because you are beautiful, smart, fun, creative, talented and so much more. Own it. 

Love+Hope+Faith, 

"Smile Everyday" Day61 "love, grow, CREATE" Love is the source of all energy. When you come from the place of love, you grow something beautiful. You create something wonderful. Start from the place of love, in stead of fear, intimidation, or scarcity... there're enough for all of us and more. Love multiplies everything. More than you can imagine. More than you expect. Then again, when you come from the place of love, why do we even need to expect? We don't have to. Because we know that with the power of love, we're taken care of. "Love life. Live your life with joy so you may fill the world with joy. Let no one leave your presence without feeling the joy of life." - Debasish Mridha #lovelivelife #lovehopefaith #sunnywithachanceofrain #smileeveryday #godisgreat #blessing #happiness #inspiration #anythingispossible #miraclemagnet #beingpositive #dreamscometrue #BEYOU #youareenough #mindfulness #youareworthit #nevergiveup #love #loveandlight #nowisthebesttime #loveiseverything #namaste #yogalove #yogaeverydamnday

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"Smile Everyday" Day60 "be your own hero" we all have some one we look up to. A teacher, a friend, parents or siblings... could be anyone. Can you call yourself your own hero? It takes guts to do it, doesn't it? Because more often than not, we don't give ourself that much credit. We value ourselvea a lot less. We think we are not worthy. But why? Why can't we be our own hero? Why can't we be true to our callings and passions? Why can't we be as great as the Universe has created us to be? We can. Be responsible for our own life. Be willing to take risks. Be courageous to live up to your potential. Be your own hero. You might end up being someone else's hero. "My own heroes are the dreamers, those men and women who tried to make the world a better place than when they found it, whether in small ways or great ones. Some succeeded, some failed, most had mixed results... but it is the effort that's heroic, as I see it. Win or lose, I admire those who fight the good fight." - George R.R. Martin #lovelivelife #lovehopefaith #sunnywithachanceofrain #smileeveryday #godisgreat #blessing #happiness #inspiration #anythingispossible #miraclemagnet #beingpositive #dreamscometrue #BEYOU #youareenough #youareworthit #nevergiveup #mindfulness #love #loveandlight #loveiseverything #nowisthebesttime #namaste #yogalove #yogaeverydamnday

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